tell me a story

[cos]

Tell me a story of something someone said or did that was so outrageously beyond chutzpah, it could only have happened if the person in question had not only a breathtaking sense of entitlement, but also no idea how out of line they were. They didn't just have a lot of nerve - they had no clue they had a lot of nerve, and observers could barely believe it happened.

Comments

[fuzzbean.livejournal.com]

When I was going through eight months of IBS hell last year (and accordingly missing a large number of social engagements), a "friend" informed me that I was clearly codependent with my boyfriend and that she had very thoughtfully made up a list of things that I needed to do to become less codependent. She made this announcement in a public forum. When I said, very politely and after a great deal of consideration and re-writing to be as tactful as possible, that this was inappropriate, she told me that I was acting like a spoiled teenager throwing a tantrum and that I didn't appreciate the love and concern that she was showing to me.

I don't talk to her any more.

[cos]

This is a good example of this other thing I've been running into stories of recently: When someone realizes / figures out / gets used to the fact that people in some particular situation or mental state show a certain pattern of behavior, and then start a) looking for and seeing that pattern even when what they're seeing may not exactly match it, but bears some resemblance, and b) further, assuming that every instance of such a pattern of behavior must necessarily indicate the same underlying cause they've got in mind.

There oughta be a word for this one, too...

[fuzzbean.livejournal.com]

Confirmation bias?

[cos]

That's related to part a), but it completely leaves out part b), which I think is the meat of the issue.

I sometimes idealize part b) for illustration as follows:

"Did you take the cookie?"
"No, I did not."
thinks: { ahah. someone who took the cookie would probably deny it. she denied it, which fits the behavior pattern I'd expect from someone who took the cookie. that means she took the cookie. }